Self compassion component for happiness:
Do you have idea about how companionate you are? I am not asking about the compassion you have for others, like parents, spouse or children, but for yourself! Recently I have studied in a newspaper where a lady was sharing her experience. She proclaimed that she cooks well when her family members are there to eat. But, when they are away she prefer to satisfy herself with bread and milk. Why she is doing so. One has to take care of themselves as much as we ensure other family member’s comfort. If it is not, you need to cross-examine yourself for the lapse. Either she may be thinking that it is her duty to look after her family or she should be longing for their appreciation. But she doesn’t have empathy for herself.
Self-compassion has 3 essential components:
This aspect is about showing ourselves the same compassionate care that we show our friends. Instead of criticizing ourselves, self-compassion involves soothing our suffering and showing up as our own inner ally. Ultimately, treat yourself as if your own family member or friend and you will definitely start moving in the direction of a more self-compassionate lifestyle.
This element is about acknowledging that everyone suffers. Truthfully, tough times are common to the human condition and no one escapes it. It may sometimes seem like everyone on Facebook and WhatsApp is experiencing never-ending blissful moments. But most of it is a disguise. Just look at how many famous people end up in rehabilitation home or how many successful people report feeling unfulfilled. We are all imperfect beings, and it is ok to feel sad if something goes wrong. Undoubtedly, we are all feeling it whether we show it or not. It is necessary to remind ourselves that we are not alone in our suffering and that we should not feel isolated by our imperfections.
If we want to relax ourselves and do better next time, we need to first acknowledge that we are suffering or that we did something wrong. It is ok to make mistakes, but we need to turn towards our feelings and behavior if we want to improve ourselves. Our minds can do some impressive tricks to repress pain or blame someone for something we have done. Self-empathy encourages us to face ourselves in a soft manner, so we can really change for the better. In order to reorganize ourselves we need awareness, so mindfulness is a necessary component of practicing self-compassion.
Art of compassionate living:
So the next time we indulge in self-criticism, that could be an opportunity realize – to become mindful of the pain, acknowledge that everyone is suffering in some way, offer ourselves some loving kindness. Additionally, the next time should be the last time and we should not postpone our initiative towards our self-caring. When we learn to harness that power, we will start moving towards greater happiness and success.
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